Is Sex Spiritual?

Is sex spiritual? In my new series beginning this Sunday morning, we will be pursuing the answer.

In the Garden, it was not good for man to be alone. Not only did it hurt man, it hurt his relationship with God, and God desires to for his relationships to be close, personal, and intimate. Even before the Fall, before Eve was created, the potential in the relationship between God and Man was not reached.

But, God allowed Adam to name all the animals, subtly creating the understanding within Adam that none of the animals was a suitable companion. And then when God brought Eve to Adam, the idea expressed in Genesis 2:24 was practically that of Adam jumping up and down in excitement proclaiming, “This is it! This is it! At last, this is somebody who is meant for me.”

So why did God want to bring in the competition? Why did God allow someone else to move in on his territory? Because God understood that done well, a relationship with Eve would help Adam grow closer to God.

Adam’s relationship with Eve included sex. Obviously, a sexual relationship helped Adam and Eve have children. Still, that was not the only purpose. The concept of “leaving to cleave,” is built upon that first marriage. Adam and Eve, in order to cultivate a healthy sexual relationship physically, mentally, and emotionally, had to learn how to cultivate a healthy sexual relationship spiritually.

That meant Adam and Eve had to look after the interests of the other, serve the other, to seek what was best for the other even above his or her own need. In short, the more Adam and Eve became like God, the healthier their sexual relationship became. The more healthy Adam and Eve’s sexual relationship became, the more they grew to be like God.

I am convicted the same holds true for us today. Good sex is a spiritual training exercise for godliness. (I can hear some husband say, “Great, I’m going to tell my wife, ‘Practice, practice, practice.’”) Marvelous. But hear me out.

When I say “good sex”, I am presupposing several things. These include:
1. A man and woman who are married to each other.
2. A husband and wife who have surrendered their lives to Christ.

The reason is simple, with God being the compass; this husband and wife will be much more inclined to serve each other. In doing so, they become more Christlike. Have you ever heard of the vicious cycle? This is the good cycle.

We, humans, think about sex every day. Instinctively, we will keep at it until we get it right. This is one the few areas of life that we will not quit. This is not an accident. God is hoping this desire will lead us to “experiment” by giving ourselves to our mates, surrendering to our mates, serving our mates, and living unselfishly. As we do, our sexual experiences gratify us more. And in the process, we become more Christlike.

Here is the catch. Every decision we make affects our sexuality. And, our sexuality affects every decision we make.

A man cannot treat people like objects, be mean to his coworkers, cheat on his income tax, and expect to be a kindhearted, tender husband in the bedroom. Consequently, his sexual satisfaction will be diminished because his wife will have trouble surrender herself to a self centered, deceitful bore.

On the other hand, a woman cannot be a shrew, undermine her coworkers, disrespect her boss, and expect to be cultivating and experiencing an outstanding sexual life. Few husbands find Jezebel to be a good draw for the bedroom.

Is sex spiritual? Absolutely. Is spirituality sexual? You bet.


Five Things I Think I Think (with a nod to Peter King for this idea)

1. I never get over how amazing Leadership Training for Christ is. It is so well run, instructive, and inspirational. Thanks to Tim Henderson and literally hundreds of volunteers for making it go.

2. I love preaching at a church where I can preach a four week series on sex. And this suggestion to preach on the subject came from our Prime Timers!

3. I am predicting Butler vs. Duke and Connecticut vs. Stanford in the two b-ball championship games. :) Okay, in all seriousness, the winners will be Duke and UConn.

4. I was sorry to see the Baylor women lose last night. Words of wisdom: "Wait until next year."

5. Today I am taking off to enjoy my kids, who are themselves enjoying a school holiday. Part of this day I am spending introducing my younger children to the blessing that is ANNE OF GREEN GABLES. I've seen this mini-series/movie probably a dozen times; it never loses its magic.

Have a great week!